Monday, May 05, 2014

Freak Out Moment

It's frightening that my daughter believes it's cool and beautiful seeing my bones in my chest, from losing weight. She marvels at them. As she suffers from an eating eating disorder, it makes my stomach turn every time notices the, BONES.  The BONES are becoming, to her her, and many girls she knows, as important as the thigh gap.


My Mom ....when she was good she was goooood.
My Mom.....when she was manic or depressed she was scary, full of fury, and fire.


Life comes full circle and I can see myself in places and faces of strangers and loves. I choose the numbness so the fury or fire stays closed off inside its hiding place. Does it even exist? I don't know. I'd hate to find out, though.


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