Wednesday, February 15, 2006
V-Day Hangover
Sign me up for a trip to the spa right now. I'm exhausted and need some serious pampering. My brain seems fried. My body is spent and I could totally just curl up on the couch and sleep for hours. (soooooo not possible.)
Maybe it's the V-day hangover. It's not like it was filled everything Vday like. It was a quiet night spent with the kids. I made microwave popcorn for me and quesadillas for the kids. How about that?
Here are a few things I'm wondering today:
Maybe it's the V-day hangover. It's not like it was filled everything Vday like. It was a quiet night spent with the kids. I made microwave popcorn for me and quesadillas for the kids. How about that?
Here are a few things I'm wondering today:
- How is it that I gave birth to a son who LOVES Star Wars???!!! If given the chance to watch Star Trek...I bet he'd become a TREKKIE! I promise that will never happen!
- Does laundry ever end? I was my daughter's age when I did it all. Hmmmm. She does try, but the folding part just requires the mommy's touch.
- How come my coffee just seems to get soooo cold so fast? Hmmmm.
- Why am I needing TLC so badly these days?
- Boys really are so much easier than girls.
- I'm having serious PMS, right about now.
That's it for now guys....I really am quite boring today.
XOXO
Christie
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Happy Valentine's Day
Here's a fun song...it's perfect. I hope your afternoons are filled with a little delight today. LOL
Yes, I love today! I'm all for the pink and red mooshy extra love giving day.
I know that some people think it's just a Hallmark Day. If it is, oh well...but I do enjoy it immensly. I'm the wear my heart on my sleeve kind of woman, as we all know. I love deeply. I give love with all my heart. SO today...is my kind of day.
The kids woke up to their little V-Day goody bags. The girlies had cute heart T-shirts, little hearts filled with chocolates, and some cute little socks. The boy had a cool heart Pez thingy with a little heart filled with chocolate.
The room mom's work is never done. LOL. I get to go pick up pizzas for the kids in Ava's class for the V-Day pizza party. She'll be passing out Bratz and Batman Valentines with little Hersheys filled in the sacks. Yes...the kids will be sugared up today.
I hope your love is overflowing today. It's just a day for the little extras. Be well sweeties. If you don't have a Valentine this year then love yourself. Go for a mani and pedi. Get a good book to lose yourself in for a while. To give love we must be able to love ourself. Start with that today if you haven't been able to do that for yourself.
XOXOXO
Christie
Yes, I love today! I'm all for the pink and red mooshy extra love giving day.
I know that some people think it's just a Hallmark Day. If it is, oh well...but I do enjoy it immensly. I'm the wear my heart on my sleeve kind of woman, as we all know. I love deeply. I give love with all my heart. SO today...is my kind of day.
The kids woke up to their little V-Day goody bags. The girlies had cute heart T-shirts, little hearts filled with chocolates, and some cute little socks. The boy had a cool heart Pez thingy with a little heart filled with chocolate.
The room mom's work is never done. LOL. I get to go pick up pizzas for the kids in Ava's class for the V-Day pizza party. She'll be passing out Bratz and Batman Valentines with little Hersheys filled in the sacks. Yes...the kids will be sugared up today.
I hope your love is overflowing today. It's just a day for the little extras. Be well sweeties. If you don't have a Valentine this year then love yourself. Go for a mani and pedi. Get a good book to lose yourself in for a while. To give love we must be able to love ourself. Start with that today if you haven't been able to do that for yourself.
XOXOXO
Christie
Monday, February 13, 2006
Snow Day????
It's a lovely Sunny "Dry" Day. Yes friends....dry as a hot warm towel out of the dryer. LOL.
So, of course it's a snow day here in Nashville!
Here are a few things heard this morning in my house:
So, of course it's a snow day here in Nashville!
Here are a few things heard this morning in my house:
- Mommy does paint wash off dogs, because I "accidently" Mocha's nose!
- Hey Mommy I'm going to use the pottery wheel and finish up the Valentine's Day gifts. I'm just going to set it up in my room. (Ummmmmm yeah right)
- I hate her she's a poopie head.
- I hate him, then. He's a Penish head. (Delightful.)
- You didn't know Mommy, but I was sleeping next to your bed when Daddy asked you if you wanted the S word. You should tell Daddy if he wants to "Massage" you then he should do it before bedtime. (LOVELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..)
- What did you get daddy for his birthday present? I got him a Shredder. (She looked at me and told me she hoped he liked it. LOL. Not a vote of confidence.)
- Hey Let's get out the paint and make something for Mommy. (sooooo cute and sweet)
Hope you're having a wonderful Monday and that today brings a wonderful thaw.
XOXO
Christie
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Snowing Again...I love it!
I had to post a little David Gray, because I was finally able to find one of his videos, other than Babylon. If you haven't listened to any of his CDs..you should! His songwriting is timeless. He is one of my favorites.
Happy Weekend....We're still enjoying a little snow.
xoxo
C
Happy Weekend....We're still enjoying a little snow.
xoxo
C
Mmmmm I make a good cup of coffee....
Happy Saturday! It's Snowing!!!!
Now, I realize this isn't a huge deal for most of my friends, but you guys....I'm from So Cal and this is Tennessee! I'm watching the flakes fall from the grey sky as I type. I have this beautiful picture window and I'm sipping coffee, CNN on, and snow falling. Really pretty.
Let me recap my day, so far (and yes it's only 7:26AM.)
Now, I realize this isn't a huge deal for most of my friends, but you guys....I'm from So Cal and this is Tennessee! I'm watching the flakes fall from the grey sky as I type. I have this beautiful picture window and I'm sipping coffee, CNN on, and snow falling. Really pretty.
Let me recap my day, so far (and yes it's only 7:26AM.)
- I woke up at 4:15 to the alarm that was set! WTF? The hubby was gone all week and it didn't go off once. Hmmmm did he decide it was time to set the alarm for 4:15?! Really, at a loss.
- Upon waking up to that shrill alarm, I realized he wasn't in bed with me. Hmmm, again. Instead, I had both children and the dogs on my bed. Lovely..lol. So, I moved the boy to the sleeping bag on the side of the bed (yes sleeping bag , because I have one in there every single night...ugh.) Ava decided she help push him off with her legs. Even in their sleep, they're still competitive.
- Next, I realize the alarm is going off again. I get out of bed and try to figure out the damn thing.
- I'm up. LOL. You know how that happens.
- Mocha and I venture downstairs to check out the snow.
- Finally, I go back upstairs and surprise surpise...Ava girl is up! LOL.
- Yes...then we play Simon Says in bed.
- Hello Saturday...and it was time to take the doggies outside.
- I'm smiling, sipping coffee...and happy I'm a morning girl.
- "Mommy Mommy...can we have popcorn for breakfast?! Please Please Please."
Welcome to my world. I do love it, though. Back to my coffee now...
XOXO
C
Thursday, February 09, 2006
If that's fat...sign me up! (kidding..)
Clothese for the LARGER WOMAN?!!!!
Have you all seen the pretty woman on the side bar or in the banner adds in the really pretty aqua colored bra? Ok...well, she is gorgeous. She looks hot in the bra, gorgeous face, and looks wonderful (to me. ) Well then I read that she's a PLUS SIZE model. WTF? Plus Size? She can't be more than a size 8. She's probably 5'10" and she gorgeous.
I hit the side bar and went to see how "BIG" the big girls really are these days. I was horrified. These women are like size 6 and 8's. How the hell is that big? Ok..there are a few 10's or 12's, but that is no fucking way big!
It's all an illusion. If the size 0's and 2's need airbrushing...well then I guess a size 6 or 8 would be considered BIG. It's just a bunch of crap. Sorry! I'm just at a loss for words. (unusual..i know.)
Check out these pictures...and tell me if you agree.
On another note...American Idol or Grammy's? I did both thank to TIVO!!!!!! I love U2 and I'm glad Kelly Clarkson is no longer a guilty pleasure. :)
xoxo
C
Have you all seen the pretty woman on the side bar or in the banner adds in the really pretty aqua colored bra? Ok...well, she is gorgeous. She looks hot in the bra, gorgeous face, and looks wonderful (to me. ) Well then I read that she's a PLUS SIZE model. WTF? Plus Size? She can't be more than a size 8. She's probably 5'10" and she gorgeous.
I hit the side bar and went to see how "BIG" the big girls really are these days. I was horrified. These women are like size 6 and 8's. How the hell is that big? Ok..there are a few 10's or 12's, but that is no fucking way big!
It's all an illusion. If the size 0's and 2's need airbrushing...well then I guess a size 6 or 8 would be considered BIG. It's just a bunch of crap. Sorry! I'm just at a loss for words. (unusual..i know.)
Check out these pictures...and tell me if you agree.
On another note...American Idol or Grammy's? I did both thank to TIVO!!!!!! I love U2 and I'm glad Kelly Clarkson is no longer a guilty pleasure. :)
xoxo
C
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
I WANT THAT ASS!
JUST SOME VALENTINE'S DAY THOUGHTS...
What better than Victoria's Secret to illustrate?
I want that ass!
I'm sure that this ass belongs to a 100lb. 17 year old, but I still want it! LOL. Hmmm..I wonder if I up my daily mileage to 7 miles a day, zero carbs, and upped the pilates...if I'd get close?
MMMMM I do want this little "Kiss Me" Set
Oh...and when did VS start selling Peek-a-boo little panties. Yummy!
Ok, so you can tell I'm in gift mode. I love Valentine's Day. Here are a few do's and Don'ts for your day
- Do write a love note to your love.
- Do spoon and touch, leading up to the V day.
- Do put rose petals on your bed that night for a little surprise.
- Do get a romantic movie like, The Notebook, if you're staying in for the night.
- Do light little tea lights around the living room for some yumminess.
- Do figure out something special for a little momento. (picture of you with a romantic note.)
- Do use red and pink tissue paper with cute ribbon for wrapping gifts.
- Do buy a bigger size if you're a man. You never want something tooo small. Snip the size out if you don't want her to know. :)
- Do get some wonderful smelling lotion and rub her back or his back. Simple yet romantic.
- Don't make a seafood dish and drink a diet coke at the same time....food poisoning for sure. (yes..been there done that.)
- Don't go and get grocery store flowers and just give them to her/him. Pull them out of the wrapper if you must and put in a little vase...or sprinkle petals on the bed.
- Don't just buy and do. Put your heart into it. More sentiment is always better than crap.
- Don't give a coupon with a promised BJ if that's not want you really want. LOL. How about a promised "Three Position Thursday" or "Wet and Wild Wednesday." (Just and idea)
FINALLY...
- DIAMONDS are always a good idea! :)
XOXO
Christie
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Karma has come to bite me in my ASS!
If you've read my blog for a while you all know that I'm a little crazy about the whole ACCENT thing. Ok, I'm a snob about it. So what?! I totally admit it.
Now, before you go freaking out on me my, little southern sweeties...I'm sure your sweet sexy drawls are fabulous. Seriously. My realtor has the cutest little voice. It's just that I'm a west coast girl. My kids have grown up on the coast. They're not supposed to sound like they're little hillbillies. (once again..no offense. LOL)It's one thing to have a sweet drawl...it's another thing to sound like you don't know the first thing about the English language. So...here I go on my rant. Just know that Darlene...you're a hot sexy mama...I'm sure you sound delicious. :) LOL. I'm more concerned with some of what my daughter is coming home saying.
Hey Mommy...I'm Fixin' to go to bed! (FIXIN'!)
Y'all need to come up and see how clean the bonus room is! (Y'all)
My and I...(not with the eye at the end...but like Meh and Ieh.)
Mommy...I love the Titans...the Chargers just suck! (sacrilegious)
So there, a few examples that just bug the crap out of me. I know...I am a snob. However, I'm the book whore, the literature fiend, and the one who would rank my Chaucer class (yes a class only on Chaucer) as one of my top 3 courses in college. Kind of a nerd, I guess (cute though.)
To better understand my total and complete freak-out,let's reflect. My husband received orders to move to Georgia. King's Bay Georgia is deep in the south, as I discovered with a phone call from a potential realtor. His drawl was so thick...I had to listen to his message 3 time! LOL. Finally...I'm going to have to leave DR. Calm!!!!!!!!!! You've never met a cuter Chinese/American psychiatrist with a Nashville twang...ever! Thank Goodness for hot sexy mamma's like Darlene, who has offered up some hot F-me shoes if they fit. :)!!!!!!
Yes..I'm rambling. Thanks for indulging me, yet again.
Love,
Christie
Now, before you go freaking out on me my, little southern sweeties...I'm sure your sweet sexy drawls are fabulous. Seriously. My realtor has the cutest little voice. It's just that I'm a west coast girl. My kids have grown up on the coast. They're not supposed to sound like they're little hillbillies. (once again..no offense. LOL)It's one thing to have a sweet drawl...it's another thing to sound like you don't know the first thing about the English language. So...here I go on my rant. Just know that Darlene...you're a hot sexy mama...I'm sure you sound delicious. :) LOL. I'm more concerned with some of what my daughter is coming home saying.
Hey Mommy...I'm Fixin' to go to bed! (FIXIN'!)
Y'all need to come up and see how clean the bonus room is! (Y'all)
My and I...(not with the eye at the end...but like Meh and Ieh.)
Mommy...I love the Titans...the Chargers just suck! (sacrilegious)
So there, a few examples that just bug the crap out of me. I know...I am a snob. However, I'm the book whore, the literature fiend, and the one who would rank my Chaucer class (yes a class only on Chaucer) as one of my top 3 courses in college. Kind of a nerd, I guess (cute though.)
To better understand my total and complete freak-out,let's reflect. My husband received orders to move to Georgia. King's Bay Georgia is deep in the south, as I discovered with a phone call from a potential realtor. His drawl was so thick...I had to listen to his message 3 time! LOL. Finally...I'm going to have to leave DR. Calm!!!!!!!!!! You've never met a cuter Chinese/American psychiatrist with a Nashville twang...ever! Thank Goodness for hot sexy mamma's like Darlene, who has offered up some hot F-me shoes if they fit. :)!!!!!!
Yes..I'm rambling. Thanks for indulging me, yet again.
Love,
Christie
Monday, February 06, 2006
MY BRAIN IS AT IT AGAIN...
I'm sitting here thinking of something good to blog about this morning. Hmmm I've got nadda! I need a jolt of inspiration. My mind is open...come on...zap me now...I'm ready...anything? Ugh..nothing.
I guess I'll have to settle with some random "Christie Thoughts of the Day."
I guess I'll have to settle with some random "Christie Thoughts of the Day."
- I've had about 3 cups of coffee this morning. Yes, I love the taste. I love how my favorite pink mug feels in my hands on a cold morning. It just warms me up.
- My cell phone is pink, too...yes girly. I really need a new one, though.
- I just finished Honeymoon, by James Patterson. He's not an author I usually read, but I at the market and needed something to read, without a trip to Barnes & Noble. As I was reading I could tell a man was writing. Somehow, the female was written from a man's point of view. Hmmmm.
- I also finished, last night during the Super Bowl, Dreaming War, by Gore Vidal. You know I'm not going into politics, but that book is enlightening. Vidal clearly explains how the war was planned before 9/11. Another, must read...if I do say.
- My sister told me that there is coconut oil that is supossed to speed up the metabolism. Farmers gave it to cows in hopes of bulking them up. Instead, the cows became lean and trim. LOL...Why not? I'm sure I could find it at Whole Foods or Trader Joe's.
- I thought the Stones sucked last night. I'm amazed at their fabulous reviews this morning. I guess they were fabulous for rockers pushing 70. LOL.
- I'm all decorated for Valentine's Day.
- I'm really having a great hair day.
- TLC is eluding me.
- Happy Monday....Love you guys.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
I'M SORRY SEAHAWKS...! I'M CURSED!
It's official. Never root for the team that I do! I am always wrong!
I'm sorry Seahawks. I'm bad luck. I sooooo wanted you to win, I should have worn black and yellow today. Then for sure Seattle may have had a chance.
Was it me, or did the Rolling Stones just suck? They sooooo did.
I got out before the game for Starbucks. You'd think I told the hubby I was leaving him for a week with the kids. Ok, well I did leave at 4:15 and I guess it was the Pre-game....then the game. LOL...deal with it, is all I can say. That's the beauty of TIVO.
As you can tell, I've got nothing tonight. I will have more tomorrow, I'm sure. I'm getting ready to be married, but single again next week. Soooo...let the fun begin.
Thanks for indulging my sweeties.
Love you all...
XOXO
C
I'm sorry Seahawks. I'm bad luck. I sooooo wanted you to win, I should have worn black and yellow today. Then for sure Seattle may have had a chance.
Was it me, or did the Rolling Stones just suck? They sooooo did.
I got out before the game for Starbucks. You'd think I told the hubby I was leaving him for a week with the kids. Ok, well I did leave at 4:15 and I guess it was the Pre-game....then the game. LOL...deal with it, is all I can say. That's the beauty of TIVO.
As you can tell, I've got nothing tonight. I will have more tomorrow, I'm sure. I'm getting ready to be married, but single again next week. Soooo...let the fun begin.
Thanks for indulging my sweeties.
Love you all...
XOXO
C
Friday, February 03, 2006
My Favorite....
i carry your heart with me
i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere i go you go,
my dear; and whatever is done by
only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you, whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing, is you.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher and higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
ee cummings
i am never without it (anywhere i go you go,
my dear; and whatever is done by
only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you, whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing, is you.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher and higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
ee cummings
MY BRAIN JUST THINKS TOO MUCH!
Last night was birthday dinner night for my 7 year old baby. I was lucky that I could talk her out of Chuck E Cheese's and we went to chilies. After that it was costs time.(Do you guys remember when costs was Price Club. Maybe that was just for us call Kids.) Regardless..I'm a costs junky. There just weren't any good books there last night. They used to carry SO many more. Not so helpful for the Book Whore in me. Oh and let's see...Did I mention all 3 kids were running the aisles? Ok..Just wanted to make sure you could understand the craziness that followed me.
anyhow...Bedtime was as soon as we arrived home. The food was put away...And yes I was able to breathe for a few minutes. I was tired. I wanted to sleep. After a little jack and diet coke and climbing into bed, it hit me that I was wired. Yap...Wired. Woo.
I'm working on a Cook Book type of creation. It will be something a little different...But have some fabulous recipes, stories...And see where it leads me. That being said...I have no control when the ideas hit me. So, last night..Exhausted...Needing sleep...Emotionally drained...My brain started firing. Ideas were flowing. I was up. Cookbook ideas...And life just flowed from the fingers to the screen. Ok...Maybe a manic moment, but I'd prefer to label it a "Creative Epiphany." LOL..Yeah..Wishful thinking.
Do you want a perfect Super Bowl Dip...I have it. Are you craving "The Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie?" I've got you covered. Hammy..Maybe I'll start posting a recipe a day? Whammy. Who knows. I am a great cook. :) Problems with figuring out what to cook and you only have chicken and Vegas? I'm the girl for you.
Coffee Coffee...do your job. Give me strength to get through the day with all the kids home. I'm married, but single for the next few weeks. Cat and Jewl..you so know what I'm talking about. I need some serious TLC.
Love you guys. Thanks for indulging me. You always do...and I cherish you guys.
XOXO
Christie
anyhow...Bedtime was as soon as we arrived home. The food was put away...And yes I was able to breathe for a few minutes. I was tired. I wanted to sleep. After a little jack and diet coke and climbing into bed, it hit me that I was wired. Yap...Wired. Woo.
I'm working on a Cook Book type of creation. It will be something a little different...But have some fabulous recipes, stories...And see where it leads me. That being said...I have no control when the ideas hit me. So, last night..Exhausted...Needing sleep...Emotionally drained...My brain started firing. Ideas were flowing. I was up. Cookbook ideas...And life just flowed from the fingers to the screen. Ok...Maybe a manic moment, but I'd prefer to label it a "Creative Epiphany." LOL..Yeah..Wishful thinking.
Do you want a perfect Super Bowl Dip...I have it. Are you craving "The Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie?" I've got you covered. Hammy..Maybe I'll start posting a recipe a day? Whammy. Who knows. I am a great cook. :) Problems with figuring out what to cook and you only have chicken and Vegas? I'm the girl for you.
Coffee Coffee...do your job. Give me strength to get through the day with all the kids home. I'm married, but single for the next few weeks. Cat and Jewl..you so know what I'm talking about. I need some serious TLC.
Love you guys. Thanks for indulging me. You always do...and I cherish you guys.
XOXO
Christie
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
"Christie I Know Why You're Soooooo Fucked Up..!"
Everyone in my family will, freely, admit we're a little nuts. Some more than others...but all are to some degree..nuts.
Now, that being said, most of my illuminating conversations with my mom happen before 7AM (my time...5AM Long Beach time.) She tries her hardest to remember the no calling before 7AM rule. That took years to be fully enforced. If it's a weekend I usually get a reprieve until 8.
Let me give you a little back brief (my term for in a nutshell.) My oldest has had so many kidney surgeries and continually has issues because of infections. My middle princess and I both just got over pnemonia...The boy is just the boy...and now I'm faced another move and self reflection. Those growths on my ovary were not cysts they were solid. All of that hit right after the new year. Soooooo...yes a handful.
Recovering and on day 3 of the Zithromax, my mom called and informed me why my life is so FUCKED up....Yes...."Fucked UP." She is a younger mom and i'm the oldest. She's nuts.
Me..Wow 6:59...you're getting better.
Mom...Christie, I know why you're life is so fucked up.
Me...Well...hi mom. I didn't realize I was so fucked up. Thank God I have coffee dripping.
Mom..Well that's the reason your fucking up your life.
Me...Hmmmm....coffee?
Mom...When you got married you promised God that you'd raise your children Catholic and you're not. That church your going to isn't Catholic and it's the only way to heaven. Now that the Pope might be getting rid of Purgatory...you need to get those kids fixed. (I do go to a Catholic Church..but there are no cadles and my mom doesn't get it...)
Me...Really...
Mom...You promised and you need to fix this.
Me...Well is that why you're so fucked up...because you Converted to being Jewish (and back again) and married Dad...and now have two catholic daughters and one jewish daughter (one sister decided she wants to be jewish.) .....Hmmmm???
Mom...Ok I'm saying a Novena...my prayers are always answered. You need to go to confession.
Me....What are you on?
Mom...Promise me in 30 days you'll have them in all the right classes.
Me...Hellllooooo...the kids are fine...happy...healthy...and all things being said, they'll go to heaven, but I'm not God.
Mom...I'm right just admit it? I'm always right...
Me...Anything else? You have 2 minutes....
Mom...Now that everyone is out of the house did you know that Daddy can walk around in a towel or naked any time he wants tooo?????
And that my friends is my life. My mom is a kook...I'm fucked up (but know i'm not).....and the thought of my parents walking around naked just because....YUCK!!!!! All of that was before my coffee......
And how was your day?
xoxo
C
Now, that being said, most of my illuminating conversations with my mom happen before 7AM (my time...5AM Long Beach time.) She tries her hardest to remember the no calling before 7AM rule. That took years to be fully enforced. If it's a weekend I usually get a reprieve until 8.
Let me give you a little back brief (my term for in a nutshell.) My oldest has had so many kidney surgeries and continually has issues because of infections. My middle princess and I both just got over pnemonia...The boy is just the boy...and now I'm faced another move and self reflection. Those growths on my ovary were not cysts they were solid. All of that hit right after the new year. Soooooo...yes a handful.
Recovering and on day 3 of the Zithromax, my mom called and informed me why my life is so FUCKED up....Yes...."Fucked UP." She is a younger mom and i'm the oldest. She's nuts.
Me..Wow 6:59...you're getting better.
Mom...Christie, I know why you're life is so fucked up.
Me...Well...hi mom. I didn't realize I was so fucked up. Thank God I have coffee dripping.
Mom..Well that's the reason your fucking up your life.
Me...Hmmmm....coffee?
Mom...When you got married you promised God that you'd raise your children Catholic and you're not. That church your going to isn't Catholic and it's the only way to heaven. Now that the Pope might be getting rid of Purgatory...you need to get those kids fixed. (I do go to a Catholic Church..but there are no cadles and my mom doesn't get it...)
Me...Really...
Mom...You promised and you need to fix this.
Me...Well is that why you're so fucked up...because you Converted to being Jewish (and back again) and married Dad...and now have two catholic daughters and one jewish daughter (one sister decided she wants to be jewish.) .....Hmmmm???
Mom...Ok I'm saying a Novena...my prayers are always answered. You need to go to confession.
Me....What are you on?
Mom...Promise me in 30 days you'll have them in all the right classes.
Me...Hellllooooo...the kids are fine...happy...healthy...and all things being said, they'll go to heaven, but I'm not God.
Mom...I'm right just admit it? I'm always right...
Me...Anything else? You have 2 minutes....
Mom...Now that everyone is out of the house did you know that Daddy can walk around in a towel or naked any time he wants tooo?????
And that my friends is my life. My mom is a kook...I'm fucked up (but know i'm not).....and the thought of my parents walking around naked just because....YUCK!!!!! All of that was before my coffee......
And how was your day?
xoxo
C
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